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Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Top 5 SNL Political Skits

Saturday Night Live has been poking fun at politicians since its debut back in the 70's. It's hard to say just how many skits they've done over the years...but there are a few that stand out more than others.

Unfortunately, not all of them are available on line. However, I have looked at over 100 of the ones that are available and come up with 5 that I consider the best!

#5




#4




#3




#2




#1

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Monday, September 29, 2008

Gun Powder for Breakfast



On Saturday I watched the transformation of my cute, sweet, considerate, six-year-old son into a wild-eyed, competitive, soccer lunatic!

As the youngest son, Nick has weathered his fair share of dust-ups with his older brother, Jack...and usually held his own. But I couldn't believe my eyes on Saturday. The mild mannered kid I tuck in every night with his favorite Webkinz was ready to put the smack down on some curly headed kid for throwing an elbow in a pile-up as they both went for the soccer ball.

I missed the first scuffle...getting to the game a little later than expected...but as soon as I arrived other parents told me that the two had been going at it since the start of the game. By half time Nick was on fire...he had already scored two goals and was chomping at the bit to get back on the field. Of course, as any dad would be...I was proud of my son. My pride shortly changed to shock as the second half started and I watched as Nick and Curly ended up rolling around on the ground!

Nick jumped up, fist clenched, ready to square off. When the coach benched him I did my best to reassure my son and find out what was really going on. I found out that the other kid had been "mouthing off" and elbowed Nick in the pileup...I also found out the kid was one of his rivals from back during T-Ball season.

Who knew Hollis Rec sports was so competetive?


As I tried to calm down my "attack son," I couldn't help but feel a little proud that he was so passionate...I mean really...it's 1st & 2nd grade soccer....how many kids get that fired up over something? To him this was important...it might as well have been the World Cup...how dare some curly headed kid with a big mouth and an uncontrollable elbow get in his way.

A couple of minutes later he was fine and back in the game, and finished without incident.

After the game, another father came up chuckling and asked if I had fed Nick gun powder for breakfast! A few others also made comment...all in support of Nick...some wished their son was so passionate. Even Nicks coach said he loved his aggression...as long as it was focused properly.

All this for a kid that had never kicked a soccer ball until 3 weeks ago!

On the ride home we had one of our first "serious" father-son talks about competition, winning and losing, and sportsmanship. I'm pretty sure it's one of those moments I'll never forget...I hope it was the same for Nick.

He told me later in the day that when he turns pro...that while he loves me...he won't be buying me a new Porsche or a beach house. When I asked him why...he replied, "Hey, I'll need to buy bubble gum and candy with that money. I can't be spending it all on stuff for you!"

That's one conversation I hope he does forget!

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Runaway dog!

So, as you know, I moved in with my boyfriend about two months ago (holy crap! it's been that long already?? Wow - time really flies when your life is great!) and as you could imagine, it was an adjustment for everyone. Especially our pets. Well, my pet anyway. He is a 7 year old Jack Russell Terrier named Roscoe, but normally we just call him 'Dude'. Saving ROSCOE for when he's naughty... Maggie is Geoff's dog, and she is a Great Dane. She is probably the coolest dog I have ever met! She is 7 as well, and the two of them get along great!

Anyhow, The Dude has always liked to get up on the furniture, sleep with me at night (even getting under the covers to keep warm) have his 'bones and cookies' all to himself and one of his favorite past times was to run off and go visit the neighbors. Well, The Dude no longer sleeps on the bed, he has his own bed. He is actually doing really well with it, he knows at bedtime just where to go and that it is just for him. Which is good. We actually have dog beds all over the house for them, two in the living room, one in the kitchen two more upstairs in the bedroom, and we even put one out in the garage! Hey - who wants to lie on cold cement? Sometimes they even share a bed, which is really neat because of the size difference.

Of all his behaviours, the one I like the least is of course the one he decided to not give up on his own...and it drives me nuts! He is as fast as lightening when he runs, and once his nose is down is is consumed with following the scent he's found, and it takes an act of congress to break his concentration long enough to get his attention so we can tell him to come back. Sometimes he does, sometimes he doesn't. When we moved one of my concerns was that we live so close to a busy road, was the dog running out and getting hit.

We decided to get a 'training' collar. Now, initially I was concerned that I was going to be hurting him, but let me tell you, any shock he might get from that collar is FAR less than the pain he'd get if he ran out into the road and got squashed by a car tire... Well, so far the collar works great - when it's turned on and actually on the dog... ARRGGGHHHH!

We've been busy in the yard the past few weekends getting mowed, raked, weeded, etc.. Getting everything tidied up for the winter. We've been cutting down dead trees, stacking the wood, getting a brush pile ready for burning, etc. We love to have the dogs out running around with us letting them hang out and do their doggy thing. They love it too. Last weekend, we trimmed the hydreanga tree, and had all the blooms sitting in 5 gal buckets awaiting their fate. The Dude hung out by those buckets for about 5 hours watching the bumble bees weave in and out and all around. He was completely mesmerized by them.

I told him what a good boy he was, and went inside to get something to drink, and when I came out, he wasn't there. I walked around calling to him, but no dog. Geoff called him, no dog. I had the 'remote' to his 'training collar' in my pocket and I pressed the 'warning' button - this emits a short beep to let him know that if he doesn't show up in T-Minus 5 seconds, he's going to get a zap from his collar.

This usually gets him back very quickly. Well, not this time. I walked the entire yard, and up and down the street in front of the house, pushing the warning button. Fearful the entire time that he would come darting out into the road and get hit. After about 15 minutes I started to change my attitude from being worried, to being downright cross. Another 15 minutes later, I was wayyyyy past cross, and onto being mad. After about 10 minutes of being mad, and cussing a blue streak at a dog who couldn't hear me, I decided to get in the car and go looking up and down the road.

I drove around our neighborhood holding the remote out the window pressing the 'warning' tone to see if I could see him moving in anyones yard. Oh - did I neglect to mention that when he ran off it was dusk?.. Little brat...

After 30 more minutes of wasting gas, and driving around aimlessly, I decided that there wasn't anything I could do. I mean, I can't just start walking through people's yards with a flashlight now can I? I was over being mad at this point, and was back to being worried. The dog has never been out alone all night, he is in a relatively new area, he has really bad eyesight at night, and we live on a busy road. I prepared myself to have a sleepless night, and went home. After sitting and brooding for a while, I decided that I needed to go to bed, but first I would send an email to my friend Wendy at the ARL and the local police department.
I told the dispatcher who was taking my call, the information on where I lived, what the dogs name and temperament was just in case they got a call, and as she was getting ready to end the call, who should come running around the corner and up on to the porch, but the dog! I couldn't believe it!
Never in his entire career of running off, has he decided to come back on his own. I was shocked. The dispatcher I was on the phone with, suggested that the mere threat of the police out looking for him was enough to make him want to come home in a hurry!

I quickly went from being sad to happy, and greeted the dog with open arms and the suggestion that he not run off again because it wasn't in his best interest. I 'beeped' the collar and I think he got the point. He hasn't run off since then, but I know that nothing is forever - and when he gets his courage back again, I can already assume that he will take full advantage of the moment that my back is once again turned.

Look at that face, how can I stay mad? He really is a good dog, he just likes to go around the neighborhood when it isn't really convenient for him to do so. It's not convenient for me either, and that is why the collar is on ALL THE TIME NOW. I will watch him and if he gets too close to an area that he should be staying away from, I don't bother with the 'warning' now, it's all about the 'zap'. Seems to be working.
He's pretty smart too... Now he knows that my bark is a lot less offensive than the bite of his collar...

Rock on with your bad self,
H
P.S.

Recently, Geoff found this cartoon - and we tried it out.
Well yeah... We're tools like that, so of course we tried it. When they misbehave, when we want their attention or sometimes just to be pains in their butts - we exclaim loudly "HEY!" their responses seem to be appropriate for the action, normally they both come running! If you have a dog, say it to them and see what they do...

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Friday, September 26, 2008

The bailout...ooops the rescue effort...umm...whatever...

Like millions of Americans I've been transfixed...watching the talking heads drone on about the $700 BILLION bailout of the nations economy.

I knew that we had reached the saturation point at my house when my 6 year old son called in from the kitchen and asked, "Dad...why are they always talking about Wall Street? Why don't they ever mention Main Street?"

Wow! How profound! Without even knowing it, Nick asked the most important question yet. The one that eluded even the most seasoned analyst on FOX and CNN.

After pausing to pull my chin from the floor...I simply said, "I don't know." To which my son replied, "It must be important...but I don't even know where Wall Street is...but I think every town has a Main Street."

I think he's probably right. I hope tonight during the debate that both candidates show us that they know what my 1st grader knew instinctively...Wall Street is obviously important...but most of us are more concerned with our very own Main Street.

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Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Ripoff

A couple of days ago they announced the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame 2009 nominees. I'd like to day that I think it's a great list...but I can't...but more on that in a minute. First, in case you missed the announcement...here's the list of this years nominees.

Metallica - One of the most successful heavy metal bands of their era.

Run-D.M.C. - Run-D.M.C. took hip-hop to the national stage in the 1980s.





Stooges - Iggy Pop and company were immediately embraced in New York, London and Los Angeles for the simplicity of their music.

Jeff Beck - Formed the first edition of the Jeff Beck Group in 1968. Inducted into the hall of fame in 1992 as a member of the Yardbirds.




Chic - Songwriter-producers Nile Rodgers and Bernard Edwards rescued disco in 1977 with a combination of groove, soul and studio smarts.


Wanda Jackson - The "First Lady of Rock and Roll" played her first tour at 18 with Elvis Presley back in 1955.



Little Anthony and the Imperials - They scored hits with "Tears on My Pillow" and "Shimmy, Shimmy, Ko-Ko-Bop".



War - War debuted with "Spill the Wine" in 1969.




Bobby Womack - Womack's career spans 55 years. He was a triple-threat as solo artist, session guitarist and writer of Aretha Franklin's "Chain Of Fools", among others.


While I agree with a lot of the nominees...I can't help but notice one glaring omission...and it's not the first time either! Once again they've snubbed one of my favorite singers...Eddie Money.

Come on would ya? What's the guy gotta do to at least get a nomination...forget about entry for a second...I'm talking about a nomination! There are members already in the Hall that were far less successful or popular...and my guy can't get a sniff? What a rip!

Let's take a look at this years nominees as an example of what I'm talking about.

Metallica: 'nuff said...these dudes rock and deserve a spot.



Run D.M.C.: Come on bro...there is no hip-hop without these cats...and they fused that whole Rock n Rap thing with Aerosmith. I got the chance to introduce them at a concert back in the 90's and it was awesome.



Stooges: OK...here's where it gets a little sketchy for me. Sure they were part of the whole punk thing...but come on, Iggy Pop spit and urinated on people! I don't care how punk ya are, spraying your spit all over another person is NEVER cool...and forget about taking a leak on someone. FREAK! So here's the first spot that Eddie should be singing Take Me Home Tonight to a very cool Hall of Fame statue.



Jeff Beck: He's already in with another band and his solo career wasn't that big...so give him Two Tickets To Paradise and send him on a vacation compliments of The Money Man!



Chic: Hell yes they belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame! Who doesn't remember going to the skating rink on Saturday night and gettin' their skate on to Good Times? This is a no brainer.



Wanda Jackson: Ummm who? I don't even know who this is! Who came up with this list? They should be Shakin' out of fear for being uncovered as the dumbest person on the planet! This should read: Multi-Platinum recording artist Eddie Money!



Little Anthony & The Imperials: What? Two hit songs...back in the 1950's? I Wanna Go Back and change this nominee...to Eddie Money.



War: OK maybe...but in an election year does Rock n Roll really want be associated with one of the hottest topic's on the campaign trail...even if it is just the name of a band...they really only had two cool songs, and one of them with Eric Burdon? My vote is NO! Instead vote for love...as in Think I'm In Love.



Bobby Womack: OK this dude spent 55 years doing his thing, and played with Aretha...he paid his dues...give the guy a drink...



I think it's pretty clear that a few of these nominees have a rightful place in Cleveland...but come on man, give a brutha a break and put my man Eddie Money on that list! It won't happen this year...but like the Yankees are saying today...there's always next year.

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Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Job applicant

My Resimay -


To hoom it mae cunsern,I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.

I kin Type realee qwik wit one finggar and do sum a counting.





I think I am good on the fone and I no I am a pepole person, Pepole realee seam to reespond too me well. Certain men and all the ladies.





I no my spelling is not too good but find that I Offen can get a job wit my persinalety.

My salerery is open so we kin discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth, I kin start emeditely.






Thank yoo in advanse fore yore anser. hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.





Sinseerly,BubbaPS: Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a pickture of me.
























Bubba, It's OK, we've got spell check. You're hired.
See you Monday…

H


P.S.
What did you say you wanted for pay?

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Wednesday, September 17, 2008

I need your input...

So after about 2 weeks of writers block I finally got some inspiration this morning after reading my e-mail.

A family member read my recent blog titled "I'm Tired"...it's the one that featured the goofy video of John McCain ogling Sarah Palin at their very first press conference.




After reading my blog and then watching the video, my family member e-mailed to say that while they're certainly no fan of Sarah Palin, the video was sexist, and proof of how difficult it is to be an attractive, young woman in the United States of America!

HUH? Excuse me...really? It's hard to be female, young, and attractive? What am I missing here?

OK...I get the whole sexism thing, the pay inequity, not to mention child birth, PMS, and the"monthly" visit...but beyond that...make like Nell Carter and GIMME A BREAK!



While I'd never want to be a woman...except to get free drinks in bars, and avoid speeding tickets...I just don't get where being a female in the United States is a problem. Especially a YOUNG, ATTRACTIVE woman. If you think it's a problem here...try living in the Middle East. THAT'S a hard place to be a woman.

Would you rather be old and unattractive? Let me tell you from experience...THAT SUCKS!

Maybe I'm missing something here...and if so...I'm all ears and open minded enough to listen. So in the words of Pat Benatar...Hit Me With Your Best Shot!




Help me understand this...I look forward to your comments.

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Friday, September 12, 2008

Hair... To cut or not to cut?

This is the question I was pondering last week.

I chose to cut, and I went short! My hair is almost as short as Bill's now!

Anyway, I don't regret my decision to cut my hair, and I've gotten many compliments on my choice of cut - well, except from my daughter. She was the first one to say "I hate it". And she meant it! She still doesn't like it! My son says it's 'cool' (and with winter coming, he's got no idea how right he is) my boyfriend likes it, my co-workers have all said it looks nice, and even the lady at my bank said "Wow! That looks great!" I am pleased to say that I have a new and stylish haircut.

But, some times folks aren't so pleased with their choices to cut their hair. And sometimes, even though they're pleased - no one else is...

This is what I mean...

The self cut that leaves us looking (and obviously feeling) stupid!








Who hasn't had good old Mom cut their hair? Hey - Ma, here's a tip. Unless you went to school for that - get away from my head. WE both know when it comes out bad, you're just going to say I cut it and that's the best job you could do to fix it... Thanks Mom, love you too.






Apparently, some of us NEVER learn about letting dear old Mom cut our hair! Come on - get a job so you can pay for a decent hair cut! What's wrong with you? You can't actually like the way that looks!!



There's always the "Hey - look what my friends did while I was passed out drunk" haircut. Oh, boy. And we keep our enemies closer than we keep our friends? Who made up that rule? Now, our friends AND our enemies are laughing at us. Great. Just friggin great.







The choice to do drugs, could take you from bad to worse...
This is the Meth-cut. Nice. Very nice.







Here's another thing - a mullet is NEVER a good fashion statement. Not even when you razor in some fancy lines over the ear...








I don't know who did this, but they should get a big fat SLAP!








Is that supposed to be funny? Cause it isn't. It's stupid.


And, I can't remember anything from the 80's that looked good... Mah Gahd!








Well...at least I got a good one. I don't have a photo yet, but be watching for the pet of the week feature that Bill and I do on Thursdays, you'll be sure to see it. And, feel free to let me know what you think.
Rock on with your bad self...
H

Oh, and by the way, if you're looking for a great hair dresser, let me know...I can hook you up!


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Thursday, September 11, 2008

Sarah Palin Interview

Tonight ABC will air part one of their exclusive interview with VP wanna-be Sarah Palin. If you miss it...don't fear ABC's gonna milk this for all it's worth! They'll air it again on Good Morning America, and then on 20/20 tomorrow night.

I for one will be glued to the TV...I just can't help but be mesmerized by the whole spectacle that is the process by which we elect someone to the highest post in the land.

So while you wait...enjoy this little treat...and I'll talk to you in the morning.

See more Gina Gershon videos at Funny or Die

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What to do!

Everyday, it seems like I learn something new about one or the other or BOTH of the current presidential nominees. Good or bad, it doesn't matter - although lately, it seems like there's nothing good going around about anyone!

Sometimes it seems more like a playground kickball game than a political race for the most important job in the free world. The name calling and the dirt slinging - it just gets to be overwhelming.

Today, this is all I am going to consider.



Say what you want, I know you smiled. I bet you even laughed, and I could probably tell you what you laughed at... It's the same one that made me spit my drink all over my keys isn't it?

Yeah, I know it is...

Rock on with your bad self,

H

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Shocking!

I love music...it's one of the best perks of my job...I sit in a room for 4 hours a day and I HAVE to listen to great music! It just doesn't get any better!

Now we all have our favorite bands, and singers. I'm fond of Led Zeppelin, The Allman Brothers Band, Eddie Money, Journey, Jimi, The Doors, The Stones...the list goes on and on.



So it was with great interest that I read an article this morning that says of all the No. 1 songs in the 50 years of the Billboard Hot 100 chart, Chubby Checker's "The Twist" ranks as the most popular single!

While I was surprised by that...it fails to compare with the shock of discovering that Elvis and the Beatles didn't even make the top five!

Believe it or not, Santana's "Smooth," featuring Rob Thomas, is the No. 2 most popular... followed by Bobby Darin's "Mack the Knife," Leann Rimes' "How Do I Live" and "The Macarena" by Los Del Rio!



My God say it isn't so...I'm suddenly suffering from a hazy recollection of a drunken night aboard a Carnival cruise set sail for Mexico where I actually took part in some passenger talent contest. Fueled by Jose Cuervo Gold and "my friends"...I attempted to actually do the Macarena...eeek! For the love of God and country...please make it stop!

From here the news doesn't get much better...Olivia Newton-John's "Physical" is 6th on the list...



Oh well, at least she was hot in that headband!

But if you thought the torture ended there...oh no...we're just getting warmed up! Debby Boone's "You Light Up My Life" is pure torture at No. 7.



The Beatles did make the Top 10...Hey Jude is No. 8.



Rounding out the top 10: Mariah Carey's "We Belong Together" at No. 9 and Toni Braxton's "Un-break My Heart" at No. 10.



After all that bubble gum you'll excuse me if I go brush my teeth...I'll talk to you in the morning...and I promise NO Debbie Boone.

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Tuesday, September 9, 2008

What about that first date?

I recieved an email from a listener, lets call him 'Sam' who stated that after 3 years of being freshly divorced from an 18 year marriage, he was ready to start dating again. The problem he was having was that he didn't know where to take his 'date'!

He asked what he should do, where he should go, etc. Now, it's been more than 20 years since 'Sam' has had to get out there and do something like this, and I can only imagine his hesitation!

Not to worry we got a lot of GREAT suggestions and ideas from all you wonderful listeners and I've forwarded them along to 'Sam' along with the following list. While cruising the net after the show this morning, I stumbled across this list.

Top Ten Best First Date ideas! (How appropriate and timely!)

No.10 - The great outdoors On your first date you want to show her who you are. So take her somewhere you like to go and do something that you like doing. If you're the outdoorsy type, go kayaking or take her on a hike -- in the winter try snowshoeing or skiing. Just make sure whatever you have planned isn't too strenuous.

No.9 - Flea market A first date is also an opportunity for you to get to know her. What are her tastes? What does she find funny? Flea markets are filled with cool, quirky stuff you can explore and discuss, providing a great chance for you to get to know one another. No.8 - Skating rinkIce skating is a classic first date, as evidenced by its appearance in 97% of all romantic comedies. (at least enough to avoid embarrassing yourself). Roller-skating is a good alternative if you can find a rink to hit up for your first date locale.

No.7 - Sporting event It may seem counter-intuitive, but a sporting event is a great first date locale. You'll have ample time to talk to each other, but the game action will give you a breather if you need it. You don't need to take her to a big league game either; college basketball or minor league baseball will work just as well.

No.6 - Breakfast Joint It's an unconventional twist on the traditional dinner date, and it works particularly well for that girl you met at the club the night before. Take her to your favorite greasy spoon for unforgettable French toast or outstanding omelets.

No.5 - Amusement park Where you take a woman on your first date sends significant signals. Take her somewhere she's been a dozen times before and she'll think you're just like every other guy. Take her somewhere unusual, like an amusement park, and suddenly you're the source of new and exciting experiences.

No.4 - The park Pack a picnic and include a decadent dessert. Buy a kite and assemble it together. Teach her how to throw a Frisbee. Plan a few different activities and you'll be sure to keep her interested at this first date locale.

No.3 - The zoo Most people -- especially single people -- haven't been to a zoo in years, so your date will absolutely be original. Even better, all the animal antics will give you lots to talk about. And who doesn't have fun in a monkey house?

No.2 - Bowling alley Bowling meets just about every criteria of the best dates: it's fun, unusual and easy for everyone to do. Even if one or both of you turns out to be a terrible bowler, who cares? You want to show her you can make anywhere a fun place to be, and you need to know if she can do the same.

No.1 - Miniature golf course The miniature golf course is another relaxed environment that makes for a great first date locale. Plus, your date probably hasn't played mini-golf since she was a kid, which makes it an original date locale.

Most of all remember, it doesn't matter if you've been dating for years, or if you're just getting back in the pool, take your time, enjoy yourself and HAVE FUN!

Rock on with your bad self,

H

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Monday, September 8, 2008

Change your attitude --

OK,

So I am not going to lie about it. I wasn’t going to blog again today. I have been so lazy with this lately it makes me angry. I can come up with a million excuses why I haven’t been blogging as often as I should. I can’t give you a good reason though.

Anyway – I was feeling angry earlier this afternoon, because I couldn’t get a decent nap. I had dreams that someone was trying to kill me last night, and I didn’t sleep much. That’s probably another entire blog and I don’t have time for it right now – so, suffice it to say that I was cranky because I couldn’t sleep for whatever reason. I moped around this afternoon, and was sluggish and cross. I wasn’t happy with myself and that didn’t make my situation any better.

After feeling sorry for myself all afternoon, I decided it was time to make dinner. Now, I know I told you that I moved recently. I now live with my boyfriend and his son in a large house that is fully wired for sound. It’s quite awesome actually. I turned on the stereo and the speakers to the kitchen and started the tunes.

I love music for so many reasons. I love music of all types, sometimes I like the sounds of a Mexican salsa, other times it is the sounds of Big Band and Swing. On occasion, I enjoy Jazz, and of course there’s always Reggae! Who doesn’t love that? Anyway, I selected Classic Rock – I know right? I NEVER listen to that!... But I have to tell you, that by my selection today I revisited my love for the ability that music has to change a mood.

I turned on the music and went in the kitchen. The first song I heard was Queen’s ‘We are the Champions’. I got all the ingredients from the cupboard and fridge that I needed to make dinner. I got the necessary cookware from the cupboard and prepared the stove for action. I started thinking about the song, instead of my task, and that started me thinking about other things. Mainly, my foul mood.

I couldn’t resist singing along, thinking about being a champion, and how good it feels.
I am a champion. I have been successful in quitting smoking! In two days, it will have been 4 months since I’ve last smoked. (Quit date was Mother’s Day Weekend 5/10/08) Holy crap! I didn’t think it would ever happen, and now that it has, I feel great! I can’t imagine actually smoking again. I love how my food is tasting, my clothes are smelling and my car is staying so much cleaner! It is easier for me to breathe and I don’t start coughing every time I laugh at something. Don’t get me wrong, I still have my fits of coughing. Bill can attest to it. Sometimes I barely make it through what we’re doing and I am dying! But I am not smoking, and that makes me a champion.

I have, with the help of my boyfriend and our collective brood of teenagers, retrained my dog to be a better person. Don’t laugh. It’s true! He used to sleep with me in the bed every night. I let him get up on all the furniture. I spoiled him rotten! Now, in the short few weeks that we’ve moved – he’s turned into such a better dog! He has his own bed at night and he totally digs it! I sorta wish I would have gotten him one sooner, but thought he was happy with the furniture. He doesn’t have to wear a leash outside anymore, due to the help of a training collar. He is much happier now than he has ever been, he likes the great energy of this household. I am a champion for making my dog a better person and for becoming more responsible about him and his behaviours.

REO Speedwagon made me realize that as far as my boyfriend, I AM going to ‘keep on loving him’ because he is the absolute most wonderful man I’ve ever met. He is everything I could ever ask for in a person, a housemate and a life partner.

Supertramp’s “Give a little bit” came on and I changed gears again mentally. I decided that I really had no reason to be grumpy. I have a great life now. I have kicked the habit. I have a kick ass job, I have a kick ass boyfriend, I live in a kick ass house! Heck, my dog even kicks ass!

No grumpies for me, I am done. My mood is great because the music I tuned into reminded me how great my life is now.

Something else I realized… It is much easier to appreciate something when you’ve worked for it.

I am going back to the kitchen to finish dinner. I hadn’t planned on this going so long. Well, then again, I hadn’t planned on writing it in the first place. But, I realize that sometimes the best things aren’t planned.

Rock on with your bad self,

H

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I'm Tired

Have you been as busy as me? It's been crazy around my house lately...the kid's are back in school, my wife is back at work, we've got soccer practice, Cub Scouts, a meeting here, an appointment there...I may need to go on vacation again!

I'm hoping this week slows down a little.

One thing I did take time to do last week was watch the Republican National Convention. Of course everyone is talking about VP nominee Sarah Palin...and like 95% of men in the country...I too think she's HOT!

I found this video and thought it was hysterical...enjoy!


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Insight of children

Q: HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?

(1) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you likesports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep thechips and dip coming. - Alan, age 10

(2) No person really decides before they grow up who they're going tomarry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you'restuck with. - Kristen, age 10

Q:WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

(1) Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then. -
Camille, age 10

(2) No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married. -
Freddie, age 6 (very wise for his age)


Q:HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

(1) You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. - Derrick, age 8


Q:WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MUM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
(1) They don't want any more kids. - Lori, age 8


Q:WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

(1) Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to knoweach other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough. - Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

(2) On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that Usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date. - Martin, age 10 (Who said boys do not have brains)


Q:WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

(1) I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns. -Craig, age 9


Q:WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

(1) When they're rich. - Pam, age 7 (I could not have said it better myself)

(2) The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that. -
Curt, age 7 (Good Point)

(3 ) The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. - Howard, age 8 (Who made the rule)


Q:IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someoneto clean up after them. - Anita, age 9 (bless you child)


Q:HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

(1 ) There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? - Kelvin, age 8


And the #1 insightful statement is........

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

(1) Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck. - Ricky, age 10
( The boy already understands)

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Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Best salad you'll ever eat!

OK, here it is... All summer long, I've been going to parties, cookouts, and shin-digs...

I've eaten things that I've really liked, some things I have liked not so much and some things that have sent me running for the nearest trash can or bathroom! Yikes! Anything good, of course I have to ask for the recipe so I can enjoy it all year long! And I know we can all appreciate a good recipe pass along now and again therefore, I am going to share with you the best one I've found all summer!

I promise it's delicious, easy and will be gone if you make it for a home dinner or to take with you to your last BBQ invite for the summer... Either way, it's delish!

Corn and Avocado Salad

Dressing
1 Tbs Lime- (I use Juice from 1 lime)
1/4 C Chopped Cilantro
2 Tbs Olive Oil
1/4 tsp salt and pepper
Whisk together in large bowl and set aside

5 ears fresh corn steamed and cut off cob
2 avocados chopped
1/2 pint quartered grape tomatoes
1/4 red onion chopped

Mix all with dressing and serve at room temp.
I usually mix right before I plan on taking it with me.
I also cook the corn the day before so it is cool and easy to cut.


Enjoy! And, if you make it, let me know what you think!

Uh, also, if there's something you really like, feel free to send me the recipe! ;)

Rock on with your bad self,

H

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Tuesday, September 2, 2008

I have a crush...

Let me start by saying that I'm a happily married guy...my wife and I just celebrated 10 years of marriage, we have 2 kids, and a pretty good life. With that said, I have a crush on another woman!

The thing is...I don't even know her...I've never met her...but she's in my house everyday. I actually hurry home just to see her! Her name? Martha MacCallum....she hosts The Live Desk on FOX News weekdays at 1 p.m.

This whole crush happened innocently enough...I never intended for it to happen. There I was...flipping through the channels one night, alone and bored out of my mind, feeling beat up and tired after watching the Red Sox lose one to the Rays. My wife was out for the evening, the kids were in bed...and there I sat with the remote in one hand, a cold Shipyard in the other...vulnerable...and then she showed up! Smart, sassy and smiling...blonde hair beautifully framing her gorgeous face...those lips so full and red...her eyes brightly twinkling...the sound of her voice and her sexy laugh made me immediately take notice. I was captivated...instantly addicted!



That night when my wife arrived home I put her on notice! I let her know that in no uncertain terms that the day Martha MacCallum came calling for me that I was gone...hasta la vista baby...so long sister...see ya when I see ya.

My wife, obviously having put up with me long enough to know what a dolt I really am, just smiled and said, "When she comes for you...she can have you!"...and then went to change clothes.

Wow! I thought she'd take it harder than that. I'm sure it was just some kind of Jedi wife reverse psychology thing...weird thing is though...I'm still waiting for Martha to show up. Hmmmm...I'm sure she just got bad directions on Mapquest.

Hahahahaha!

Seriously Martha...call me!

Talk to you in the morning.

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The Movie Guy is Dead

For those of us in radio, television...heck, even movie geeks and Geigo customers...today is a sad day because Don LaFontaine has passed away.

You probably know Don best for the Geigo commercial where he's introduced as "that announcer guy" or you know him from movie trailers where he would start a voiceiver with the phrase, "In a world where..."



Don voiced thousands of movie trailers and almost 350,000 commercials.



He was 68 and passed away from complications from a collapsed lung.

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