Time for another change...

So, I am not much on making New Year's Resolutions. But that doesn't stop me from making commitments and keeping them. Somehow, the word resolution throws me all off kilter.


I have successfully been a non-smoker for more than 10 months and am doing great. That's not to say that I haven't thought about it. I think of it often, and sometimes wake up feeling guilty if I have dreamt that I was smoking! I don't like the smell though and I almost gag when I walk by someone who's smoking. BLECH...



Quitting smoking has done wonders for me though, my food tastes different, my car smells great and stays clean a lot longer. My clothes and hair smell fresh and clean all the time and no more ash tray mouth! I smoked for 21 years and am confident that quitting at the right time makes all the difference. Unless you're committed, it's not going to work.



In my efforts to quit and stay smoke free, I took on a few more pounds than I'd have liked to. I suppose it's all relative if you think about it. Not really a trade off as far as I am concerned, I'd rather have the weight than the habit. I wouldn't say that I've gone overboard or anything, I can still fit in all my same clothes, but I know it's there just the same.



So, I have decided to make another commitment, and that is to join a gym. I have thought about it for a few months, I've prepared myself for the commitment, I have mentally gone through my schedule, chores and recreation time and have decided what time of day will work best for me. I have made the choice and will stand by it.



I went online and printed out a program to get me started and will take it with me to the gym to make sure I don't forget something, and that I do what I am supposed to. Walking in there is overwhelming and trying to figure out what to do first is oppressive. I took that away by going with my daughter a few times and doing what she does. I've spent some time with the equipment and don't feel that it's too intimidating anymore. The free weights frighten me a bit but with experience and use that will go away too.



I am excited about this, although I hate exercise, I look forward to building stamina, strength and being healthy. I look forward to seeing a better version of myself. (I think of it as Heidi 2.0!) I am in a really great place in my life, personally and professionally. Time to step it up and make myself as good as I can be. I am going to attack it with the same ferocity as I did quitting smoking. That turned out great, this should too.

Rock on with your bad self,

H

90,720 minutes. WOW I feel great!

Just about 90,720 minutes ago, give or take a few, I quit smoking.

To prove a point, I am going to use really big numbers here - and if you do smoke I hope it scares the hell out of you. Just like it did me.

For those of you who don't smoke, or never did - there are 20 cigarettes in a pack.
I smoked a pack a day. And did so for almost 21 years. That is 7,665 packs of cigarettes OR 153,300 individual cigarettes.

Holy cow. Puts things into perspective doesn't it...

I have heard smoking just one cigarette will take anywhere from 11 to 15 minutes off your life. I will be working from the higher# of 15 for this exercise, just in case. (I also don't know if it matters if you're female or male. I've heard a lot of different things through the years and when you don't want to hear something it is amazing what you will forget!)

So, by working with the figure of losing 15 minutes for each cigarette smoked, I have successfully eliminated 2,299,500 minutes OR 38,325 hours OR 1597 days OR almost 4.5 years.


Now, isn't that something to be proud of?
I totally can't wait to tell my kids what a real idiot I am. NOT!

I know what it is to smoke and like it. I know the feeling of panic that sets in when I am stuck in traffic with no smokes and no store in sight. I know the shaking angry feeling that comes on when you've been without nicotine for several hours or days and you just want to scream like there's no tomorrow. You would give your eye teeth for just one cigarette. You see someone else smoking and you just want to break their arm off to take their smoke away from them so you can have it.

Ahhh....

Or so you think...

Look at this... www.tobacco.org/Resources/599ingredients.html Aside from the chocolate, honey and plum juice - I can't think of too many things on this list that I would like to ingest...

Now, I won't go all psychotic on you - remember, I liked smoking. I am all for personal freedoms and equal rights.

No one can tell you when the time is right. No one can make you quit. You have to do it in your own time. You have to WANT to quit. It isn't easy and I won't lie to you and say it is. It pretty much sucks, no matter how you go about it. I hated every second of it. There are moments that I still hate it. But they're getting less and less every day.

My reason for finally quitting, was because I am stubborn. I don't like to think that someone or something has control over me, and these little coffin nails sure did! They controlled my every move! I couldn't get in the car or get on the phone without smoking. I couldn't drink coffee or take my dog out for a walk. I was being controlled by a little cardboard box full of cancer. I didn't like that feeling, so I decided it was time to quit. Don't even get me started on the expense!


If you want to quit, are trying to quit, are thinking about quitting, or you are a happy smoker and think that perhaps in a few years you'll quit - then talk to someone about it. Ask others what's worked for them. Have them tell you about their experience if you think it will help you. There are agencies and companies who focus on nothing but smoking cessation. A good one for the state of Maine is http://www.tobaccofreemaine.org/ These folks are trained at helping you not only quit smoking, but also understand the effects that smoking AND quitting will have on you. The best part? Their program is FREE!

Look, here's the truth. Plain and simple. Smoking kills. It isn't cool. Smokers stink. Their clothes, hair, homes and cars smell bad. Their noses don't smell too good and therefore, they can't tell how bad they stink! I can say this, because I was one. I am not unfairly speaking here, if you know a smoker then you know what I'm saying is true.

If the truth hurts, then do something about it. I don't care to hear you complain to me, so save your breath.

Because if you don't quit smoking, you're gonna need it.

Rock on with your bad self,

H