Cold enough for ya?
This cold snap is already on my nerves for one reason and one reason only! It brings out the card carrying junior weather men. You know the guy...he watches the Weather Channel every waking hour and TiVo's it while he's asleep.
This dingle-berry can rattle off the low temperature in Broken Knee, Wyoming or recite facts about the heat wave of '56 in Possum Creek , Kentucky...in other words he needs to move out of his moms basement, stop stalking Matt Zidle at News 8, and get a life.
He's the same guy that's guilty of committing my BIGGEST weather related pet peeve...waiting until the temperature spikes to one extreme or the other...and then trying to make light of it all. For example, he waits until it's 10 below 0 and while you're standing there in your coat, gloves, and hat and still shivering...he'll say, "Hey...cold enough for ya?"
OH MY GAAAWD...I HATE THAT GUY!
It takes every fiber of my being not to say, "Why heavens no. I regularly pour water down the back of my pants on days like this and hope it freezes in my butt-crack!"
God bless this poor guy. Part of me feels kinda sorry for him. Really...that's probably the wittiest line he could come up with. But the overwhelming part of me can't feel for him...because after I would say something sarcastic like that...he would then go on to tell me about a show he saw one night on Science History Channel that dealt with that very issue...thus ruining my ever thinning mood.
I guess the point of all this is that it's OK to talk about the weather...heck, complain about it if you want...but for the love of Kevin Mannix...don't ask me if it's cold enough...because the answer is obviously YES! YES IT IS...as a matter of fact it's so cold that my kids won't have the joy of buying me a new nose hair trimmer for my birthday because all of my nose hairs have turned to icicles and have started dropping out of my nasal cavity at an alarming rate...it's quite the spectacle!
On that note I'm off to LL Bean for some new thermal undies...don't even get me started about shopping for those!
Labels: cold snap, cold weather, icicles, Kentucky, Kevin Mannix, LL Bean, Matt Zidle, The Weather Channel, TiVo, underwear, Wyoming
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